1. |
Rabbit Hole
02:24
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Here I go down the rabbit hole again
If there’s really this much evil
The world is not my friend
I want to protect you
But I don’t know if I really can
Here I go down the rabbit hole again
I’m not really needed here anymore
Everything feels difficult
When I walk into the door
I want to belong here
But I don’t know if I really can
Here I go down the rabbit hole again
Another sleepless night
Just writhing in the bed
A few innocent clicks
With something that I never should have read
Then the heartache and the dread
Here I go down the rabbit hole, my friend
You don’t want to hear it so you don’t pick up on your end
I don’t wanna feel abandoned
But I know I already am
Here I go down the rabbit hole again
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2. |
Homecoming
02:33
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I can barely look at pictures
From the final years
In the first home that I owned
Placing all my bets on moving
Whether I’d feel any better
Was still unknown
It was supposed to be triumphant
It was supposed to be so grand
It wasn’t meant to be
Such an anticlimax
So hello to my future
And goodbye to all my friends
At least we have
That row of mountains
It's where they’ve always been
It's where it's always been
It's where it's always been
It's where it's always been
It's where it's always been
Nothing ever is a cure all
The grass ain’t greener on the other side
I still have those memories
And I hold them dear
But when they hurt
I push them aside
It was supposed to be triumphant
It was supposed to be grand
It wasn’t meant to be
Such an anticlimax
So hello to my future
And goodbye to all my friends
At least we have
That row of mountains
It's where they’ve always been
It's where it's always been
It's where it's always been
It's where it's always been
It's where it's always been
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3. |
Spread My Ashes Around
02:53
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They say that life is fragile
Well I ain’t got one anymore
Everything unravels
And you end up where you were before
I’m back in my hometown
I spread my ashes around
Just feeling like a ghost
Already disappeared
While I grin and bear
Nothing should ever feel so tough
I got one reason to go on
And I hope that is enough
I know my time’s been wasted
I just can’t think of that anymore
It was improper placement
And my body it kept the score
I’m back in my hometown
And I burned everybody out
And I sure don’t wanna beg
Everything is not
Some sinister plot
But it often feels that way
I got one reason to go on
And I hope that’s enough to stay
I gotta stay
Stay
Stay
Stay
For Mae
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4. |
Waiting On Getting Well
03:12
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All your life you search for it
But you’ll never find it
Maybe on some long endless drive
But heaven don’t arrive
That’s the shackles of earth
That’s the shackles at birth
You drink every day to get by
Waiting on paradise
My grandfather said
Growing old is hell
And I know life is suffering
And waiting on getting well
But we still have some story here left to tell
It’s a day at the beach
It’s that crisp fall air
It’s the way that I felt when I first met her
It’s the smell of her hair
It’s a simple chord structure
A song that moves me to tears
We dance around the room
That’s as good as it gets here
My grandfather said
Growing old is hell
And I know life is suffering
And waiting on getting well
But we still have some story here left to tell
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5. |
Empty House
02:31
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Today I felt nostalgic for
The time that I was suffering most
It was a morbid feeling
I’ve had it a few times before
You’ll never really know at all
The town that you were born in
It’s probably not important
It’s on my mind again
I really felt so feeble
As I walked the empty house
Tears they filled my eyes
As I was checking
To make sure
We got everything else out
It’s all just a dream by now
A figment at arm’s length
How did I last that long
If it was something I really hated
I’m taking long mental walks
In buildings I once occupied
I couldn’t forget them
Even if I tried
I didn’t leave on good terms
At least not in my mind
Feeling forced out of town
In a hidden, bitter,
Unfathomable fight
I really felt so feeble
As I walked the empty house
Tears they filled my eyes
As I was checking
To make sure
We got everything else out
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6. |
Blank Slate
02:49
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I wanna be a blank slate
Untouched and unpaved
I wanna be like the me
Before they addled my brain
So pure and unscathed
So pure and great
I wanna have some heroes again
I wanna reconnect with my friends
I wanna be like the me
Before I’ve been where I have been
So pure and clean
Much more serene
This isn’t for eternity,
So I’m eternally grateful
Another six months pass by
And I’m feeling more hopeful
This isn’t for eternity,
So I’m eternally grateful
Another six months pass by
And I’m feeling more faithful
It’s supposed to be do no harm
Now I’m living under constant alarm
I wanna be at peace
I will regain my sense of calm
So there’s nothing wrong
And there’s no more storm
I’ll need a new place to begin
Really thought I was at my end
But when it flairs and I’m suffering again
I’ll just tell myself this
And I’ll reiterate it
This isn’t for eternity,
So I’m eternally grateful
Another six months pass by
And I’m feeling more hopeful
This isn’t for eternity,
So I’m eternally grateful
Another six months pass by
And I’m feeling more faithful
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7. |
Take It
02:15
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You just gotta take it, you gotta fake it
Then you’re gonna make it you’re gonna make it
I know you’re feeling tired, you’re very tired
Soon you’ll be much wiser, you’ll be much wiser
I couldn't see the light
I was blinded with fright
Got reassured
By the sick and the cured
Now I try to give back
Since I’m feeling better
What feels eternal
Will not be forever
You just gotta take it, you gotta fake it
Then you’re gonna make it, you’re gonna make it
I know you’re feeling tired, you’re very tired
Soon you’ll be much wiser, you’ll be much wiser
Drowning in fear
For over two years
Thought I was stuck
But they picked me back up
Look for a guide
To the other side
Pay your dues
And then you will rise
You just gotta take it, you gotta fake it
Then you’re gonna make it, you’re gonna make it
I know you’re feeling tired, you’re very tired
Soon you’ll be much wiser, you’ll be much wiser
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8. |
Impossible Stuff
00:44
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I've got some time today
I'm gonna walk around the pond
Think of how far I've come
Thinking of struggles that I'm waiting on
I don't want this summer to end
And I don't want you to grow up
Just more impossible stuff
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9. |
Win You Back
02:48
|
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Looking at pictures
From way back when
We were happier then
There’s no reason we
Can’t be happy again
We had a few rough years
We were dying slow
It’s time to let em go
Let’s give it another chance
It’s time to regrow
I gotta win you back
No matter what I do
I wanna be the man
Who’s standing next to you
You’ll still be impressed
By something that I do
And I’ll be impressed
By something too
And there’s your deep laugh
It’s been a little bit
Since we had heard it
Let’s make that sound
More consistent
Moving back home
Didn’t solve any problems
But with more time passed
Things are leveling out
Coming up from the bottom
I gotta win you back
No matter what I do
I wanna be the man
Standing next to you
You’ll still be impressed
By something that I do
And I’ll be impressed
By something too
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10. |
Find What You Love
02:00
|
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All I eyes on you
As you make your mark
You’re feeling blue
In the world at large
You better
Find what you love
Find what you love
But you never will
If you play your part
Role through life
With half a heart
You’ll never
Find what you love
Find what you love
I’m a cancer
I like four walls
Surrounding me
As I pace the halls of
My empty house
This empty house
I need something
to confine me
Expecting everything
to come easily when
It never does
Looking back on what was
The past has passed
It just went to fast
I miss that town
And I missed my chance to
Find what I love
Find what I love
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11. |
Mainstream Matinee
03:21
|
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I think I’ll take the blue pill today
Jump inside that mainstream matinee
It could put my mind at ease?
I will be fed and I will believe
I’ll take a bunch of half truths
Help me construct my worldview
I’ll take what you say as normal
Help me to shape my shakey morals
Could I get a little 24/7 fear?
365 days a year
Such great lengths to scare the masses
Is it for control or is it for profit?
I’ll take a bunch of half truths
Help me construct my worldview
I’ll take outlandish exaggerations
Fact checked with no evidence or explanation
Batten down the hatches, nobody wins
But everybody’s gonna play
Stuck inside this mainstream matinee
Stuck inside this mainstream matinee
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